#hes so blind

[shesmore-shoebill]

"I had choice paralysis :(" is a KILLER line.

He's such a comedic powerhouse, I'm glad more people are getting exposed to him :'D

[saixria]

The sillies

When even Athena the Virgin goddess whose most intimate encounter was stabbing her bff thinks you’re cooked, you’re definitely cooked

[gingermintpepper]

I think, perhaps one of the funniest things to come from EPIC popularising the Odyssey is that now a ton of people think Poseidon wanted to kill Odysseus.

In the Odyssey, Poseidon has no intention of killing Odysseus. In fact, part of the whole reason Zeus lets Poseidon do whatever he wants even though he thinks Odysseus is rad and should get to kiss his wife is explicitly because Poseidon had no intentions of killing Odysseus. Poseidon wanted to pay back the suffering/inconvenience blinding Polyphemus would have caused. It's a really abstract thing tbh. How do you pay back someone permanently disabling your son? Poseidon's solution was just to amputate Odysseus from his other half; i.e. Penelope. The end game was never murder, it was always an endurance race.

(Od. Book 1: Zeus reassuring Athena that he is not, in fact, a part of Odysseus Hater-Nation. Trans. Robert Fagles)

Also, for those wondering if there's any sort of in text reason for why Poseidon wasn't around in God Games - at the time in the Odyssey when Athena petitions Zeus to let Odysseus leave Calypso's island, Poseidon was -checks notes- on vacation in Ethiopia. Yep. He left to Ethiopia for a festival and thusly was very much absent for Athena's whole "please let Ody go? Please? 🥺" request.

(Od. Book 1: While Odysseus was suffering, Poseidon went to party in the east)

I am begging y'all to read the Odyssey. It's a comedy for everyone except Odysseus and Penelope who are, in fact, suffering 24/7 365.

[eggdrawsthings]

"I've accepted my darkness What have you done with yours?"

[puppyeared]

thanks @chipper-smol for getting me ISAT i will be so irresponsible with the looping

[demaparbat-hp]

*pats Zuko's head* This bad boy can fit so many near-death experiences.

.

Read For the Spirits Chapter VIII here!

[daeyumi]

i love it when ppl put kirby into desserts

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

This wine tastes like pigs blood!

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[mccromy]

I picture Ming Fan as the perfect teacher's pet, not in an ass kisser way, but in a was-born-for-this kind of way. If the authority figure is a cruel sneering villain, he is a cruel little minion hunched over rubbing his hands on the corner. If the authority figure is an old man with mommydaddy vibes, he's the neighborhood's unattainable MILF's son who clearly wants the cool Martial Arts champion to be his new dad and not you, I'm going to tell mom you hit me you little shit.

Unfortunately in the last scenario his aspiring stepdad is his little shit of pseudo (martial) brother, who wrote a poem titled something that Ming Fan interpreted as "Shixiong's mom has got it going on" which thankfully flew right above Shizun's head. Ming Fan just KNOWS that if Luo Binghe asked Shizun if they could marry pretty please Shizun would sigh and accept but only because Binghe has been such a diligent and filial disciple and he deserves a reward. And Ming Fan is not unaware of how incestuous he makes it sound, but you don't live here you don't know what he's going through.

He tried to keep Luo Binghe's grubby paws away from his shimei, but he focused so much on guarding the cabbage patch he didn't see Luo Binghe sneak past and towards the farmer's house!

Thank Heavens the farmer is so far removed from mortal issues he doesn't notice the beast he collared wants to be his house wife.

So Ming Fan, instead of a little henchman, becomes an anxiety riddled teenager, seeing gold diggers hiding in every corner. Ning Ying Ying tuts and tells him he's being ridiculous, to which Luo Binghe shakes his head and says:

"No, no. I see them too."

[aiiwa]

suna absolutely needs to see your pussy when you fuck and he’s incredibly embarrassing about it. uses the harsh light of his phone so he can watch the pad of his thumb roll your puffy clit before dipping two long digits between your silky folds. he thinks this lighting is the best cause your pussy glistens like glitter for him — his favourite is when you’re on top and he gets a nice full view of you squirting all over his cock <3

[periswirl]

Poison Ivy is hired to revive an extinct flower. It's good money and the flower has no adverse effects on the environment so she's more than happy to take the job.

She thinks everything is good and continues to grow these flowers for her client. Until a child shows up in her greenhouse and informs her that the flowers she's been providing are actually going to a branch of the government and are being used to destroy the a different realm.

The government has been tricking her into destroying the environment, earthly or not. Soon they'd learn exactly why Poison Ivy is feared.

[koszmarnybudyn]

Monster John is something that can be so very special.

[potato-lord-but-not]

sorryyyy sorry sorry

[420technoblazeit]

crazy that ted nivison is just the whitest guy on earth. i bet he gets excited about toasted bread with butter. i bet he plays golf. i bet he claps when the plane lands. i bet he goes ooh! dont mind if i do and wiggles his fingers whenever he sees a chip bowl. he's like a mayo gijinka

[choccy-milky]

(ominis is already on his family's plan but he's there to annoy seb anyway)

[they-them-pussy]

new metric for media literacy for film bros is if they understand the barbie movie.

the kens are first presented as accessories to their barbies and it's pointed out loud that they don't even have places to stay in barbieland. one of the barbies straight up asks "wait, where do the kens stay?". they're just arm candy made to look pretty and cool while the barbies run their world.

but that's fucked up!!! the film presents it as fucked up! that's why ken screams "YOU FAILED ME!" and why he is insecure in the first place because he wanted to be respected and seen as a person, not someone who only exists in relation to someone else. should he have done what he did? no!!! that's why it's part of the conflict! the root of both of their breakdowns was in their society in that the barbies are supposed to be perfect and the kens exist in relation to them! it's barbie and ken. he was a footnote. that's why barbie apologizes to him in the end and tells him he can be himself. she doesn't have to exist by some set of rules and neither does he! it's barbie and it's ken! sure, the resolution to the whole barbieland issue wasn't perfect, BUT KEN'S WHOLE ARC IS ABOUT HOW THEIR WORLD FAILED MEN. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS MOVIE WAS 'WOMEN GOOD MAN BAD'. WHAT ABOUT THE NUANCE